Parenting Hacks: Making the Journey More Enjoyable
Parenting is beautiful and difficult all at the same time. There are moments of pure joy and laughter. There are also be times of frustration, exhaustion, and doubt. When the going gets tough, it's important to not feel so alone in all of it. Here are some tips and hacks to help make parenting more enjoyable and just plain easier:
1. Self-Care is Essential
Prioritize sleep: Aim for 7-9 hours of quality sleep each night. (I know this one is laughable if your kids are young, so utilize supports when you can)
Eat well: Fuel your body with nutritious food. Remember to check in with your own needs and hunger cues.
Exercise: Even little movements count! Do a yoga video with the kids, schedule in “10-minute” speed tidy-ups with the family, go for walks.
Find a hobby: Having something you enjoy outside of parenting is crucial to getting a mental break.
Seek support: Talk to friends, family, or a therapist about your challenges. This one feels so hard, but is equally as impactful!
2. Set Realistic Expectations
Minimize comparing yourself to others: Every family and relationship is unique. Set boundaries around social media if you notice it fuels comparison.
Focus on progress, not perfection: Small steps are the quickest way to big achievements.
Be flexible: Things don't always go according to plan, and your kids need to see you modeling how to adapt and be flexible when life throws curveballs.
3. Positive Reinforcement
Praise your child's efforts: Maximize the good and use planned ignoring to minimize the bad. Kids do better when they are told they are good inside.
Normalize Emotions: comment on how healthy it is to have and need to express emotions (the happy ones and the sad ones).
Avoid negative consequences: Try to figure out the need underneath your kids behavior rather than increasing consequences.
4. Effective Communication
Active listening: Pay attention to what your child is saying and show that you understand by being curious. Five minutes of your undivided attention is more powerful than 30 minutes of you multitasking with your child
I-statements: Express your feelings without blaming or accusing. (ex: I felt upset when… VS You made me upset when…)
Family meetings: Schedule regular family meetings to discuss concerns and make decisions together. These check-ins can be informal and part of a bed time routine or something more structured like a sit down at the dinner table.
5. Quality Time
Spend one-on-one time with each child: Show them that they are special. Sibling competition decreases when your children know their relationship with you is not affected by your closeness with another.
Create family traditions: These can help strengthen bonds and create lasting memories. Bonus points if you can get candid photos to look back on!
Unplug and connect: Limit screen time and spend quality time together doing activities you enjoy. This one requires you to lead by example.
6. Practice Patience
Take a deep breath: Remind yourself that this moment will pass. A pause now will lead to intentional actions rather than hurting the relationship.
Count to ten: Give yourself time to calm down before responding.
Remember, kids are learning: They are absolutely going to make mistakes, but that’s how their brains grow and they learn a key skill in relationships- how to repair!
Remember, parenting is a journey, not a destination. There will be ups and downs. One of the most important tips might be to accept that you are going to mess up, they are going to mess up, and you both can learn together how to repair relationships, own your mistakes, and practice reconnecting after your feelings get ahead of your actions and words. Relationships grow stronger, and our kids learn more, when we mess up and own it.
If you are an overwhelmed or exhausted parent, you might benefit from therapy. Learn more about parenting therapy here.
